Valentine’s Day is seen as a special day for expressing your love, often through gifts to another. Knowing your loved one’s “love language” can help ensure that any gift given, be it for Valentine’s Day or throughout the year, is better received, loved, and utilized. Basically, it means to pay closer attention to what makes your spouse, parent, child, friend, partner, etcetera tick. Knowing what it is important to them is the key. Traditionally, it is thought that there are five basic languages of love. This blog will look at each “language” and provide an example of a gift that might be best suited to those that seem to utilize that language most. The brief definitions for each language is taken from excerpts from She Knows and Oprah Magazine.
Words of Affirmation
These are verbal (or written) expressions of care and affection. Think: “Thanks for putting the kids to bed” or “You looked really nice today.” Conversely, insults can be particularly upsetting to people who favor words of affirmation.
Presenting gifts that let the other person know you want to make them feel special would fit into this category. A gift could be as simple as a jumbo wall calendar that you write words of endearment or special reminders and dates that are meaningful to the person you’re giving it to. Verbally you can give a gift that keeps giving by presenting someone with a reader machine, such as the Milestone 212, where you can pre-record your voice expressing your love and gratitude for the recipient that can be played throughout the year.
The person who loves this language thrives on the love, thoughtfulness and effort behind the gift. In short, actions speak louder than words. Think about finding a gift that your partner has been asking for or would enjoy receiving and plan for a special way of giving it; make it a surprise. The act of giving a gift tells your partner you cared enough to think about him or her in advance and go out of your way to get something to make your partner smile.
If you know the person enjoys reading or doing crafts but lack the needed light to keep from tiring their eyes a color changing LED lamp might be a good choice to give. Something as simple as a pair of designer reading glasses could also be a good choice for the crafter or reader in your life that have a small amount of sight issues. If your loved one has a hard time waking up when their alarm goes off in the morning and has stated that they wished they could find a better way to make sure they awake in time then this sonic boom sweetheart alarm clock might be an ideal choice. Basically, it’s any gift that shows you are paying them attention and know what they like, want, or need.
Acts of Service
Doing something helpful or kind for your partner. Think: Waking up with the baby in the middle of the night or doing the dishes so your partner can relax. For someone who favors acts of service, ambivalence or a lack of support are more damaging than anything else.
The WayAround starter pack or WayAround laundry starter pack are both excellent choices if the person you’re shopping for is visually impaired. These starter packs are a way to label the everyday things in our lives to make it easier to function. The WayAround product line is a combination of smartphone app and physical WayTags™ that allows you to tag and label nearly everything in your environment. Helping in the kitchen is another way to show someone you care. There are plenty of kitchen and cooking aids to choose from depending on your special someone’s needs.
Engaging in an activity together, particularly one you both enjoy, like a walk after dinner or watching a movie with a bowl of popcorn. If this is your love language, having a distracted or distant partner that makes you feel unseen or unheard is the biggest pitfall.
Games such as Rummikub, chess, large print playing cards, or dominoes are all great suggestions for time you can actively spend together. If watching a movie is more your style ensuring that each person can do so comfortably will make the time spent together even more special. This wireless tv SoundBox brings adjustable TV sound right in front of you or where ever you go within your home. No longer will you (or your loved one) have to strain to hear your TV from across the room.
People who speak this love language thrive on any type of physical touch: handholding, hugs and pats on the back. Physical touch is the most direct way to communicate love. As long as it’s done in an atmosphere which is loving and not oppressive, physical touch can be the most effective of the love languages. It calms, heals and reassures.
In addition to the touch between two people other ways to express this language is through gifts that promote a calming sensation of touch such as a massaging neck pillow or a heated foot massager. Another option more commonly given to a child, but to which many adults also enjoy, is a simple snuggle pillow or stuffed animal. Soft little mementos that when hugged will make you think of the person that gave it to you.
The bottom line is that not everyone loves in the same way, so being aware of the different love languages can not only help you understand the other person better but it can also help you be a better gift giver (or receiver if both parties are on the same page).